Right Now...

I'm sitting on Sproul Steps reading Cymbeline and occupying Cal. Like I do.

On The Personhood Movement...

This whole trend of fetal personhood is really starting to piss me off. And I'll tell you why. 

There are the conventional pro-choice arguments (which I love), but this new brand of pro-life venom is particularly perturbing because it leaves out the most important part of the equation:

THE WOMAN.

They spout their theology and their crap about "fetal rights," but the problem I have with them is that they don't mention the woman at all. Not even as "the mother." It's ALL about the fetus. It's as if this fetus is developing in a vaccum, when in fact it is developing in a living, breathing person.

Argument Fail #1:

"Abortions should not be used in cases of rape because it's wrong to punish the child for it's father's sins."

OK. This argument acknowledges the rapist and the fetus, but not the rape victim. It's even worse to punish the woman, who has already been through so much. And let's think about this. What kind of life is that child going to have knowing that it's a constant reminder to its mother of the violence done to her? You can't talk about rape without talking about the woman. You just can't. Leaving her out is like raping her all over again. 

There's so much hoopla about fetal personhood, but not enough about female personhood. And that isn't ok. 

GAH!!!! *face palm*

The 99%

I've seen a lot of these and I wanted to add my voice.

My name is Ali Arman. My dad came to this country and my mom came from a working class home. Both of them sacrificed to I can go to college at UC Berkeley.

My dad made money in the stock market in the 1990s. We're not in the 1%, but we're up there. I have WAY more than I need.

I've dedicated my life since I was 11 to social justice and using privilege for good. But that's not always enough. I support the 99% because I'm part of that 99%, after all.

Rise of the Eco-Douche

The environmental movement is an important one: we have destroyed our planet. This problem is worthy of our attention and needs a solution. It has caused severe climate change, extinction of species, natural disasters, and other environmental tragidies. However, the movement has given rise to another cultural predator: the echo-douche.

We've all met them, especially here in Northern California. They're usually rich white people who drive a Prius, hassle their neighbors about recycling, shop at Whole Foods, and buy the expensive and trendy "green versions" of products. They're usually the same people who send their kids to private schools, tacitly support tax cuts for the rich, and employ people of color to do the house and yard work that they don't want to do. For them, the green fad/movement has become a way to assuage their guilt and say, to themselves and the world, "I'm not a total asshole, I care about the EARTH!"

These douchebags are everywhere. What makes the eco-douche so special and so dangerous? He has succeeded in taking critical problem and commodified it. Instead of contributing in a meaningful way to a viable solution, the eco-douche has commodified that solution and turned it into a status symbol, an example of the class stratification in the United States. It's expensive to be "eco friendly" (synonym for eco-douche). And it's doing more harm than good.

Take, for example, the Prius. Lovely looking car, great step on the road towards electric cars and less oil dependency. Problematic. Why? Well, it takes more energy and emits more carbon to make a Prius than is saved by driving one. And it's ridiculously expensive, more in the "luxury" category than the "affordable". These are not new or hidden facts. So why do people keep buying them? For the same reason they became eco-douches in the first place: to capitalize on a movement they don't really care about. The Prius is a status symbol of self-importance that says, "I'm better than you because I'm saving the Earth AND because I'm rich."

And then there's Whole Foods. Ugh. Organic food, outrageous prices. There is no reason to shop at Whole Foods (aka Whole Paycheck) when there's a Trader Joe's with the same thing at half the price right across the street (as is the case in my hometown). But the truth is, when the eco-douche shops at Whole Foods, he makes a statement that isn't just about food, just like it isn't really about the environmental movement. It's about the package it comes in. The green movement has been hijacked by capitalism.

The truth is, being "eco friendly" has become the domain of the wealthy and privileged. They don't have Whole Foods stores in the inner city and in low-income areas. Buying any kind of car, let alone a Prius, isn't an option for everyone. When you're struggling to feed your family, you probably don't have the extra money to spend on the "green" brands. The solution isn't more eco-douches, whose products creation, shipping, and handling actually harms more than it helps. The solution is a more accessible movement. The eco-douche shouldn't have a problem with this, because it's about the environment - right?

I ♥ Sluts

The other day I was coming from ballet and walking back to my car. I'd taken off my tights and was just in my leotard and spankies. This old lady looked at me and said, "Oh honey, don't dress like that. You're gonna get raped."

Really? It's over 90 degrees outside, but I'm supposed to be wearing tights and a sweater because something about my leotard inspires violent and misogynistic crime?

Really?

There is this terrifying culture of "slut shaming" that I see around me, and it pisses me off. When it comes to rape, we as a society are so quick to blame the victim. "She was asking for it because she was dressed that way." I see where this comes from. For one thing, there's the need to paint the victim as being somehow different from us. We need to distance ourselves from her so we don't have to face the fact that we could be her. Then there's the more salient fact that to admit the victim is blameless is to admit that there are problems in our society that make it dangerous for women to walk home alone at night, or wear tight clothes, or even just exist. That's crap.

We need to place the blame where it belongs: with the rapist and the patriarchy who created him. Because if we don't address the actual problem and keep blaming women, we'll never fix that problem and the cycle of violence will continue. As it has. I see it all the time. Men hit on me all the time on BART, on the street, on the bus. They talk to my chest or just stare at me. And I'm not even wearing "slutty" clothes. But even if I were, that's not ok. I don't stare at men's junk through their cargo shorts, do I? It's not ok for women to stare at men's crotches because it's rude, but when men look at me and make me feel really uncomfortable, it's just "boys being boys." Which is just one step away from, "Rape is just boys being boys." Which is "It's men's right to look at you. You're just an object, a pretty thing for their amusement." No. I'm just trying to get to school. Fuck off.

So head high sluts, ballerinas, high-heel lovers, and anyone else. And I will be dressing in my shorts and a low cut top when I feel like it. And I will walk back to my car without having a man accompany me. Why?

Because I should be able to.

Open Letter to My Nemmy

This is an open letter to my dear friend and second mother, who left seven months ago and hasn't been back since.

Hey.

You've been gone a long time. And now you're coming back, I think, but I'm not sure. This wouldn't be the first time you were supposed to come back into my life and didn't. But that doesn't matter. I know that it's just a matter if time before we're forced back into each other's lives and there are some things I wanna say. Starting with this.

I'm sorry. I did things and said things that, looking back now, are abominable. I'm not going to make excuses and I'm not going to explain, because there are no excuses and there is no explanation. I'm sorry.

I miss having you in my life. You have missed so much. I have too. Makes me sad. 

I'm not angry with you. If I said I didn't feel some anger, though, I'd be lying. But I don't hate you. I have never been angry at you. I've been angry at your actions, your words, and your choices, but never with YOU. Please know that.

I do want you back in my life. I don't know if that can happen but I want it to. At this point I guess it's up to you. If you were standing in front of me now, I don't know what I would say about this. And I don't even know what I want to say now, sitting in front of my computer and typing this. Great.

I'm glad that you were able to reach back to me. It gives me hope. I'm not sure what I'm hopeful for, but I know there's hope there. It's out of our hands now :)

I love you, I promise.

Why You Crying?

The other day I was having a terrible day, the kind that makes you feel like the entire world is crashing down around you and you can hardly breathe. I was sitting on a stoop outside the Ballet School when a well-meaning passer by came up to me and asked, "Why you crying?"

I'm crying because Bush initiated the Patriot Act and now my entire Iranian family is on the "no fly" list.

I'm crying because I live in a capitalistic society that measures the value of my person by the value of my capital.

I'm crying because my grandparents don't speak English and I have no way to connect with them.

I'm crying because I'm starving myself in order to feel feminine enough in my culture.

I'm crying because my dearest friend is stuck in a patriarchal relationship in which her fiance won't let her see her friends.

I'm crying because I don't know how much of me is me and how much is constructed.

I'm crying because fix it.